


Butterfly Kisses

by Katybug1992



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Father-Daughter Relationship, Female Alexander Kerfoot, Growing Up, child alexander kerfoot, child jt compher, child tyson jost
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-25
Updated: 2020-10-25
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:41:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27193918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Katybug1992/pseuds/Katybug1992
Summary: From the day Gabe brought Alexandria home from the hospital, she was his whole world.
Relationships: Gabriel Landeskog & Alexander Kerfoot, J. T. Compher/Alexander Kerfoot
Comments: 2
Kudos: 34





	Butterfly Kisses

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the song "Butterfly Kisses" by Bob Carlisle

1.

Gabe’s “surrogate” had given birth and he was in his car before he really knew what was happening. He had spent the last nine months in anticipation, getting everything ready for her. Tyson had been helping him mentally prepare, EJ and Nate had helped with the nursery, the team threw a baby shower. His sister had convinced him to let her come to Denver so that she could take care of the baby while he was gone.

But as soon as he got that phone call, Gabe’s excitement turned to vague terror. He was going to be a dad in a matter of hours. He barely remembered to text Tyson as he entered the hospital.

He was directed to a private room and told that a nurse would bring the baby in. The mother had been a young girl, barely in high school, who the adoption agency had put him in touch with. He insisted he pay all her medical bills and hired a private tutor for her so she wouldn’t get behind in school. She was a good kid and he didn’t want one mistake to derail her life.

“Mr. Landeskog?” a nurse asked softly as he wheeled the little baby bed into the room, containing a little pink wrapped bundle.

“Yes,” Gabe choked out, eyes locked on his daughter - his DAUGHTER - and slowly filling with tears. He had been waiting for this moment for a long time.

“She’s perfectly healthy,” the nurse informed him, passing picking up the bundle and placing her in Gabe’s arms.

“And her mother?” Gabe asked, eyes focused on the baby’s face, taking in every feature of the sleeping infant.

“She’s healthy,” the nurse replied, “asked not to see the baby. She didn’t want to regret giving her up.”

“She can see her anytime she wants, it’s in the contract.” Gabe replied, “Can you please remind her of that? I want… I want Alexandria to know her birth mother if she wants to know her daughter.”

“I will,” the nurse nodded, “Alexandria is her name?”

Gabe just nodded, “Alexandria Melanie Landeskog”.

“I bring in the birth certificate for you to fill out shortly.” the nurse smiled, “She’ll be ready to go home in a couple of days. You can, of course, visit her whenever you would like during visiting hours.”

“Thank you,” Gabe replied, clearly distracted.

“I’ll leave you to spend some time alone with your daughter.”

“Hi, Princess,” Gabe smiled down at the baby, lightly running a finger over her cheek.

He felt himself tear up when she blinked herself awake and looked up at him with wide brown eyes and he instantly knew she would always have him wrapped around her finger….but so would her uncles. Oh, they didn’t stand a chance with her.

+

A couple days later, Gabe was able to bring her home and nearly jumped out of his skin when his team yelled out “Surprise!”

The lights flipped on and Gabe’s living room was overflowing with all things pink.

“Wha -”

“When we had the baby shower, we didn’t know the gender.” Tyson replied with a shrug.

Gabe set down the carrier and picked up Alexandria, shushing her gently as she fussed just a little.

“Erik,” Gabe walked over to the defenseman, “wanna meet your God-daughter?”

“Hell yeah,” EJ breathed out, both he and Gabe ignored the offended noises that Tyson and Nate made in response. As Gabe set her in his arms, EJ grinned down at her - teeth in for once - and Alexandria looked up at him, head cocked to the side like she was trying to figure out whether she liked him or not before she made a happy little noise and smiled a little. And, yeah, EJ was crying as he said, “Yeah, you’re gonna run this house.”

It took a lot of convincing for EJ to agree to let someone else hold her, but when he finally did pass her off to Tyson he immediately hugged Gabe, “Congrats, dad.”

“Thanks, EJ,” Gabe replied, hugging him back tightly.

2.

Beatrice insisted on decorating and planning Alexandria’s first birthday. Gabe was having a hard enough time coming to grips with her already being a year old and he didn’t need to worry about a party on top of that. And Gabe could not have been more thankful that she had wanted to move to Denver to help take care of Allie.

“I’m not letting a nanny half-raise my niece,” she had informed him when she said she would take care of Allie when Gabe was gone.

And Gabe had come downstairs to see that pink and glitter had thrown up all over his living room and dining room.

“B, where is my daughter?” Gabe asked, walking into the kitchen to see his sister holding Allie while mixing up the punch, “And what is she wearing??”

On Beatrice’s hip was perched Allie, looking very upset to be dressed in a puffy pink, purple, and white sparkly princess dress. Her hair was in a braid and she had a crown headband on.

“Really?” Gabe chuckled, taking Alexandria from his sister.

“I don’t have much longer before she starts fighting pink. Let me take advantage of dressing her like a princess!”

Gabe just laughed in response, “She’s just gonna get cake all over it.”

“It’s washable.”

+

Tyson supplied the Smash Cake - in all of its pink glory - and Gabe was happy that his teammates and family all insisted he be in the moment, they would take the pictures. 

So Gabe was able to fully enjoy helping Allie open her presents. And able to fully enjoy her smashing the shit out of the cake. And able to fully enjoy her reaching out to Nate while she was covered in cake - and Nate was so weak for her and ended up giving in and picking her up, thus covering his shirt in cake and then his hair and face.

3.

Nate insisted on making the cake for Alexandria’s second birthday and Gabe was worried. Because the thing needed to be edible and Nate wasn’t exactly known for his cooking skills.

But he let EJ worry about that. Erik wouldn’t let his god-daughter eat poison and Tyson was supervising. Beatrice wanted to decorate again and Gabe requested she tone it down a bit. 

On the day of the party, he got Allie dressed - in a simple blue dress because she started screaming if he tried to put anything else on her. He knew he was going to get a look from his sister and mother when they saw her, so he carefully braided her hair and added the crown headband - which she would definitely take off by the time they got to the park the party was being held at.

+

“What did your daddy put you in?” his mother cooed as she took Alexandria from Gabe, glaring at him.

“She picked it out,” Gabe defended himself, wincing as his sister hit him.

“I knew I shouldn’t have let you dress her,” Beatrice hissed, glaring at him.

“It’s what she wanted to wear! She started crying every time I tried to put something else on her!”

The party went smoothly. The kids ran around on the playground and then it was time for cake. And Gabe tried to hide his wince when Nate presented the objectively terrible looking cake.

And Allie backed up against Gabe and gave him a weary look when she saw the cake.

“I don’t want it, daddy.” Alexandria whispered.

“I don’t want you to have it, either, Allie-Pop,” EJ whispered back to her, ignoring the looks he got from Gabe and Nate.

“It’s not poisonous,” Tyson assured Gabe.

“Uncle Nate?” Allie turned to look at the blond.

“Yes, princess?” Nate knelt down next to her.

“Did you really make this?”

“I did.”

“Small bite.”

Gabe laughed, cutting a small piece of the cake and holding the fork out. Smiling as Allie carefully chewed it and tried not to spit it out.

“It was good,” Allie slowly told Nate, who laughed at her lie and swooped her up.

“Uncle Tyson bought a cake in case this one wasn’t good,” Nate chuckled as she twined her arms around his neck.

“Thank you for trying,” Alexandria replied earnestly, kissing his cheek, “Love you, Uncle Dogg.”

Nate laughed loudly in response and tightened his arms around her, “Anything for you, Princess.”

“Who wants edible cake?!” Tyson grinned, bringing out the store-bought sheet cake as EJ gleefully threw Nate’s cake away and swept Alexandria out of Nate’s arms and danced around with her, leading everyone in the birthday song.

3.

They were visiting Erik’s ranch shortly after her third birthday and Gabe was suspicious. From the minute they had arrived, he had known EJ had something up his sleeve and Gabe really wished he’d get it over with. He tried to relax a little while they ate - Allie telling EJ all about her current favorite princess. “Brave” had been playing on a near loop and Gabe didn’t even try talking her out of bringing her Merida dress with them, which she was wearing currently, along with the bow and arrow accessories that Tyson had presented to her (and then almost immediately regretted because EJ had taught her how to shoot it and Tyson became their favorite target).

“I have something for you, Allie-Pop,” EJ grinned, sweeping her up as they finished lunch and leading the way to the pasture, “You see that pony right there?”

“Yeah,” Alexandria nodded excitedly. She loved visiting EJ and Gabe was pretty sure that it was because she loved horses almost as much as she loved Erik.

“She’s yours,” Erik whispered, giving Gabe a playful look, “her name is Princess Allie. Her daddy is Landeskog.” 

“She’s beautiful,” Alexandria breathed and Gabe gave EJ a look.

“She has to stay here, but she’s yours,” EJ replied, “When she’s a little older, you’ll be able to ride her.”

“Thank you, Uncle EJ,” Alexandria tightened her arms around his neck

+

Landeskog the horse was saddled up when Alexandria woke up from her nap. EJ got himself settled into the saddle and Gabe lifted Alexandria to sit in front of him.

And he knew that EJ would never let Allie fall, would never let her get hurt. Still, he couldn’t help the worry that curled in his chest. And EJ had had her on horses with him since she was a baby. But that knowledge never helped Gabe for that first minute or so.

“Daddy, look!” Alexandria called.

When Gabe looked over, Alexandria was holding onto the reins, directing the horse around the enclosure.

“Good job, Allie!” Gabe bit back his worry and grinned at her.

She shot him a huge smile and then asked EJ if they could go faster.

“Not too fast!” Gabe called out.

“I know,” EJ responded, rolling his eyes playfully at Alexandria, who giggled as EJ took the reins back in one hand, tightened his other arm around Allie, and picked up the pace a little.

Gabe closed his eyes and let Allie’s delighted laughter wash over him. She was growing up so fast. Too fast.

5.

She was four years old when she started hockey. She’d been skating for years - technically before she could walk - but Gabe still stood nervously by the glass as she zoomed her way around the ice before the practice really got started.

“She’ll be okay,” Tyson said, coming to stand next to Gabe. When Gabe gave him a confused look, he said, “We figured someone should be here with you and since EJ had plans and Nate should probably be prevented from getting too involved in her hockey until she’s a little older, I volunteered.”

“I know she’ll be okay,” Gabe replied, eyes following his daughter on the ice as she skating around with a little boy.

Throughout the practice, Alexandria and the little boy stayed practically glued together.

“Looks like she made a friend,” Tyson nudged Gabe a little.

Gabe grinned in response. Alexandria had always been on the shy side, the only children she regularly interacted with were his teammates’ kids. 

+

“Daddy!” Alexandria called, running over to Gabe after practice, dragging the little boy with her, “Uncle Bear!”

“Allie-Pop!” Tyson greeted, his smile wide as he crouched down and laughed as she threw herself into his arms.

“Daddy, I met a Tyson!” Allie’s eyes shone as she introduced Gabe to her new friend.

And Gabe chuckled before introducing himself to Tyson’s mom and apologizing for his daughter dragging him away.

The entire drive home, Allie chattered on and on about her new friend Tyson and Gabe made a note to get his mother’s phone number after the next practice so that she and Tyson could see each other outside of practice.

6.

Allie is five when Gabe lifts the Cup. And the minute he passed it off to EJ, he took her from his sister and swung her around. She laughed loudly and clung to him. And he couldn’t bring himself to put her down for the duration of the on-ice celebrations, only letting her uncles take her occasionally.

+

The next morning, they ate Lucky Charms out of the Cup before getting ready for the private Team celebration that would be at their house.

When she came back downstairs, she was wearing her Johnson jersey and Gabe sighed. EJ had been so proud of himself when he had gifted her that and had refused to take it off for almost a week. She had MacKinnon and Barrie jerseys as well but EJ’s was her favorite of her uncles’ jerseys.

“I wore yours last night, daddy,” Alexandria giggled at the look on his face.

“Yes, love,” Gabe laughed, swooping her up, “but we’ve talked about not making Uncle EJ’s ego bigger.”

Alexandria just smiled and hummed to herself as Gabe stood her on the couch and started working on getting her wild hair manageable.

He knew he failed when Beatrice entered and gave him a look, picking up Alexandria from the couch and carrying her upstairs. When they came back downstairs, Allie had her dark hair neatly braided with burgundy and blue ribbons braided into it.

She chattered excited with her aunt until the front door opened and EJ yelled out, “Where’s my favorite kid?!”

“Uncle EJ!” she wiggled out of Beatrice’s lap and ran toward the door, laughing wildly as Erik swept her up.

“Allie-Pop!” EJ grinned widely, “I love your jersey choice.”

Nate rolled his eyes and accused Gabe of being at fault for the jersey choice when he arrived, Tyson choosing to try to guilt Allie into changing the jersey to his.

7.

Christmas was always hectic and Alexandria was always ridiculously spoiled. 

“Daddy,” Alexandria wandered over to him, hugging his legs while he talked to Tyson.

“Yes, Princess?” he smiled down at her.

“What time is Josty coming over?”

“He and his mom are coming over tomorrow for brunch,” Gabe replied.

“Why can’t they come over now?”

“Because tonight is for family,” Gabe scooped the six year old up.

“But Josty’s my family, too!” Alexandria replied, “He’s my Tyson.”

Gabe chuckled and kissed her forehead, “Yes, but his family is in town. Your Uncles’ families aren’t, which is why they’re here. You’ll see him tomorrow.”

“Fine,” Alexandria replied, trying not to look too disappointed.

“Come on, Allie-Pop!” Nate ran over with her coat, “It’s snowing!”

“Daddy!!” Alexandria looked at Gabe, her eyes shining brightly, “Magic snow!”

“Well, you better go outside and make a wish!” Gabe replied, setting her down and smiling softly as Nate barely managed to get her coat on her before she was running off the door out to the deck.

“Magic snow?” Tyson asked softly.

“If it snows on Christmas Eve, you make a wish.” Gabe responded like Tyson should have known that. 

He stood where he was, watching as Alexandria was picked up by Nate and was pointing up toward the sky.

“She’s growing up so fast,” Gabe whispered, mostly to himself.

“You still got some time,” Tyson replied with a smile, “you have at least six years until she starts to hate you.”

Gabe laughed in response and gave Tyson a half-hearted shove before turning his gaze back to the deck, where Alexandria had her head resting against Nate’s, who was swaying them gently.

8.

Alexandria is seven when it becomes clear just how smart she is. Her teacher became worried that she was bored in class because she was definitely ahead of her classmates, so she got extra worksheets for when she finished the assigned ones. And she was reading way above her age range, had been since before she even started school. She loved books.

She starts only asking for books. So Gabe lines the walls of what used to be the playroom with bookshelves and turns it into a library for her, filling the shelves with all kinds of books - some he knows she’ll get to when she’s older, some he knows he’ll have to read to her. He puts in an over-stuffed armchair that can currently fit both of them but Gabe knows won’t be able to for much longer and a couple of those big bean bag chairs, a couple of large pillows, and a number of fuzzy blankets.

And Nate became her main supplier of books, seeming to have several new ones to give her every time he saw her.

EJ had to be convinced not to gift her another pony in retaliation. 

“You’re still her favorite, you know,” Gabe laughed as EJ glowered at where Alexandria was curled up next to Nate and flipping through the book of fairytales he had just given her.

“Won’t be long before neither of us are her favorite,” Erik responded sadly, “Gabe… she’s growing up so fast.”

“I know.”

“Are you dealing with that?”

“Truthfully? I’m ignoring it.” 

“I’ll join you in doing that, then.”

Gabe laughed and pulled EJ in for a hug.

9.

EJ had offered to watch Alexandria so that Gabe could help Beatrice find a new apartment and for both of them to have some kid-free time (also he loved the one-on-one time with Alexandria).

When Gabe got home, his eight year old daughter crawled out of the blanket fort and ran over to him as quietly as she could.

“Shhh, daddy!” she whispered, hugging his legs, “Uncle EJ’s sleeping!”

“Oh, really?” Gabe chuckled, walking over to the blanket fort and looking in, seeing EJ hugging Alexandria’s Carlton plush (Gabe had been so worried about how Allie would take Tyson’s trade; he had sent her a Carlton plush that she hugged whenever she missed him).

Gabe struggled to keep his laugh in when he noticed that EJ had make-up on.

“Did you do this?” Gabe raised an eyebrow, struggling to keep a straight face.

“I’m sorry,” Alexandria looked at the floor.

“You did a good job, Allie-Pop,” Gabe replied, “Definitely an improvement to what he normally looks like.”

“I used Auntie B’s make-up,” Alexandria replied, scramp=bling into the blanket fort carefully to bring out the small make-up bag that Beatrice kept at the house.

“Why don’t you go put that back in B’s bathroom and get washed up for dinner?”

“Okay, daddy!”

When she was upstairs, Gabe squatted down in front of EJ and snapped a quick picture before saying, “Morning EJ. Love the new look.”

“Wha….?” Erik groaned, throwing Carlton across the fort when he realized what he had been holding and reached for his phone, turning on the front facing camera and groaned, “She was sleeping when I fell asleep.”

“She hasn’t really napped in a couple of years,” Gabe grinned, “She doesn’t tend to stay down when she does nap. I did think I had a couple more years before she started experimenting with make-up.”

“Well, I would appreciate not being the person she practices on next time,” EJ replied, wincing just a little as he stood up, heading to the kitchen to try and was the make-up off.

“How was she?”

“She was good,” EJ replied before clearly debating with himself before adding, “I would talk to her about Tyson. She misses him.”

“EJ -”

“She named the bear Uncle Tyson,” EJ replied, “She misses him just as much as you do. He’s been around her whole life. And now he’s not. And I don’t think she really understands why.”

“....I’ll talk to her,” Gabe sighed, running a hand through his hair, “You wanna stay for dinner?”

“Sure.”

+

Gabe perched himself on the edge of Alexandria’s bed, tucking her in as she hugged Carlton - Uncle Tyson - close to her.

“Uncle EJ said that you really miss your Uncle Tyson,” Gabe said softly, moving her hair out of her face.

“Yeah,” Allie replied, hugging the bear tightly.

“You should have said something, Princess.”

“But you miss him, too.”

“We can miss him together, Allie,” Gabe replied, “Do you wanna FaceTime him tomorrow?”

“Yeah!” Alexandria nodded excited before reaching to pull the book off her night stand, “Can we read the next chapter?”

“Of course,” Gabe smiled, taking the well-loved copy of ‘The Secret Garden’ from her and opening to where they had left off, cherishing the moment as he probably didn’t have much time left before she decided that she was too old to be read to before bed.

10.

Beatrice had a work trip and Gabe didn’t like leaving Alexandria with the Josts for longer than a week, so Allie would be coming with him on the almost three week East Coast roadie. Her hockey season had ended and she was several weeks ahead of the rest of her class so her teacher didn’t see an issue with her missing that much time - she did provide a binder of worksheets for Alexandria to complete so she had something to keep her mind working.

And the guys loved having her there. EJ had spent the majority of the plane ride from Denver watching Trolls with her before they both fell asleep. Nate had shaken his head and pulled a blanket down from the overhead bin and wrapped it around them before turning off the movie.

Gabe mouthed a thank you and Nate just shrugged in response before taking his own seat next to Burky again.

+

On their first day off in Boston, Gabe asked what Alexandria wanted to do, the nine year old responded she wanted to see Harvard - Beatrice had showed her Legally Blonde and Alexandria had loved it - she had been Elle Woods for Halloween.

So they found themselves in Cambridge, walking around the Harvard Campus with EJ, Nate, and Burky.

“I love it here,” she whispered as they walked into the library.

“Yeah?” Gabe asked, smiling down at her.

“It’s perfect,” Alexandria nodded, looking one hundred percent serious.

+

They returned to the hotel having spent way too much at the Harvard bookstore - Allie now the proud owner of three hoodies, four t-shirts, a sweatshirt, two pairs of leggings, a pair of converses, a scarf, and a flag. Gabe had also picked up several books for himself on preparing a child for Ivy League and what to expect.

Because when Alexandria made up her mind about, nothing would stop her.

11.

When she was ten, Alexandria came home from school and calmly informed him that she had gotten her first period and that Josty’s mom had stopped at Walgreens on their way home to buy her some pads. She then gave him the pamphlet that the school nurse had given her and said that Aunt B had gotten her a couple of book on her “changing body” if he needed more reading material.

He had laughed and thanked her before telling her to go get ready for the game that night.

+

When they got home that night, she said goodnight and headed up to bed.

And when Gabe checked in on her and saw she was sleeping, he headed to her “library” and easily found the books she had told him about, thanking her mentally for being the most organized child on the planet, and settled into the armchair to read the most pertinent sections.

+

The next morning, he watched from the door as she got in Mrs. Jost’s car and waved his thank you before settling down with his coffee and calling Tyson.

“Do you think Allie needs a mom?” he asked before Tyson even got a word out.

“What are you talking about?” Tyson asked, caught completely off guard by the question.

“Do you think she needs a mom? Did I royally screw up by not providing her with that?”

“You give that girl everything she needs.”

“Material, sure, but Tys…. she started her period yesterday and… there’s so much she needs to know that books can’t teach her.

“And she has Beatrice to answer those questions, to give her those talks.”

“But -”

“Gabriel Landeskog,” Tyson’s voice left no room for argument, “you are the best dad to that little girl. She is so lucky to have you. And she’s smart. She knows that you can and can’t help her with. You’d have to ask B, but I’m pretty sure Allie has already texted her.”

+

“So, why’d you want to get lunch?” Beatrice asked as they sat down, opening her menu and waiting for her brother to talk. When he turned slightly red and kept his eyes on the menu, she grinned, “Allie told you about her visit from Aunt Flow?”

“She told you?” Gabe looked up, making a face at her term.

“Yes, she texted me from the nurse’s office yesterday,” Beatrice smiled, “We’re getting lunch on Saturday to have the Big Girl chat. And then I’m taking her bra shopping because she’s going to need them soon.”

“Thank you,” Gabe breathed out in relief, “I read the books you gave her but… just… thank you for everything you’ve done for her...for us.”

“Gab, you are the perfect dad for her. You’re the only person she needs.”

“But I can’t be a -”

“She doesn’t need a mom,” Beatrice cut him off, “Just… keep doing what you’ve always done and she will be fine.”

12.

Alexandria is eleven when Gabe retires. He had been getting older and there were only so many shoulder surgeries he could take before the surgery just didn’t work anymore. And Alexandria would be starting middle school and she was had made a select team with Josty and Gabe wanted to be able to enjoy being a hockey parent - maybe he could step in and help coach, if anything he could play one-on-one with Allie.

He announced his retirement at the end of the previous season, with Allie standing next to him, telling the gathered press that spending his career in Colorado was the honor of life but he was ready to be a full-time dad.

He was incredibly thankful that EJ had stuck around Denver after he had retired, it was nice to have him around when he felt like he was going crazy without hockey, especially during the day when Allie was at school.

He took over drop off and pick up from Josty’s mom, he went to every practice and game to make up for all the ones he missed. He got the chance to actually get to know the other parents more. 

But more importantly, he got to see Allie play. And she was good. Which he knew, but it had been so rare that he really got to watch her. And she was one of the best on the team, a natural center, threw more hits than he was comfortable with - her uncles would be so proud. 

Shortly into her season started, EJ started showing up most of the games, Nate going to the ones he could. And she seemed to play even harder when they were there.

And while Gabe missed hockey, missed playing the sport he loved so much, he didn’t regret retiring. Because being a full-time dad was his new passion. And Allie would always be what he was most proud of.

13.

Alexandria is twelve when Gabe learns how awful middle school girls can be to each other.

She had been quiet the entire ride home from school and when they got home, she had gone straight up to her room, muttering about needing to start on her homework, despite it being Friday.

His phone went off and he saw a text from Allie’s Tyson that said “You need to talk to Allie”.

And Gabe sighed. They apparently had reached the age where she stopped coming to him with every problem.

He took a deep breath before heading upstairs.

“Hey, Allie,” he leaned against her door frame, spotting her on the bed with her books set out in front of her but clearly not focusing on them, “everything okay?”

“Josty texted you, didn’t he?” she looked up with an extremely unimpressed expression.

“He’s worried about you,” Gabe replied, “Wanna tell me why?”

“There are these girls…”

And Gabe needed a minute. Because Beatrice had warned him, repeatedly, about how mean girls could be to each other and how it would likely get worse once Allie hit middle school, but he never really thought that Allie would be….

“They call me names, they make fun of me for always knowing the answer, for always wanting to answer the teachers’ questions, for being better than the boys in gym, for not dressing like a girl…” Alexandria finally looked up at Gabe and he felt his heart shatter when he saw her beautiful brown eyes shining with tears, “and I just want them to stop. Why won’t they stop?”

“Oh, Allie,” Gabe breathed out, crossing the room and pulling her into a hug, closing his eyes as she sobbed into his chest.

He didn’t know what to do to help her, so he did what he had always done when she was hurt. He held her and whispered soothing words to her. And made a note to ask B if their mom talking to the mean girls’ moms had ever helped or if it had made things worse. But that was a question for tomorrow. She had two days before she needed to see those girls again. Maybe they could spend the next day getting lost in the mountains. Or skating.

All he could do was make sure that she knew that she could always come to him, that he would always be there for her no matter what.

14.

“You gotta talk her out of it!” Josty ran over to Gabe when he was picking them up from school, “She’s lost her mind!”

Gabe chuckled at his dramatics until he saw his thirteen year old daughter trudging out of the school, hair in her face so he couldn’t see her expression. His expression twisted and he resisted the urge to ask her what was wrong.

When they got home, she went right upstairs and didn’t respond when he tried knocking on her door. He figured he would give her time, that she would come to him when she was ready.

+

It was the next Sunday that he realized something was really wrong, that it wasn’t teenage girl stuff. Sundays were here Hockey With Uncle Nate days, had been since she started playing. And usually she was a whirlwind of excitement as she waited for Nate to pick her up. But that morning she had been more subdued, to the point that Gabe took her temperature in case she wasn’t feeling well and was trying to hide it.

But she didn’t have a fever and she plastered on a smile when Nate walked in.

“I’ll talk to her,” Nate muttered as he took her hockey bag from Gabe, looking just as worried as Gabe felt.

“Thank you,” Gabe responded. It had taken him a while to get okay with the face that he wouldn’t always be the one she wanted to talk to about everything.

+

When she and Nate got home several hours later, she went right upstairs to shower and but from the quick glimpse Gabe had caught of her, she seemed like she was feeling better.

“I think you need to look into getting her on a different hockey team next season, maybe a girls’ team,” Nate told him as he set the bag down by the door, “Tyson seems to be the only kid on the team who actually likes her. She said they other boys get mad at her for being better than them. She said she wanted to quit because they don’t know how a team acts.”

“It would be nice for her to play with other girls,” Gabe sighed, “Why didn’t she tell me?”

“Landy, it took me running drills with her for two hours for her to tell me what was going on,” Nate replied, “I think… I was thinking…. The US and Canadian women’s teams are playing at the All-Star game this year. I think… I think she could benefit from meeting them. She mentioned that one of the things the boys always tell her that she should just quit hockey now because women can’t play in the NHL and no one likes ‘girl sports’ anyway.”

“Are you asking if you can take her to the ASG with you?” Gabe asked.

“Only if you’re okay with that. I just think it might help her confidence a little.”

“I think so, too,” Gabe replied with a nod.

“She can stay with my parents whenever I can’t keep an eye on her.”

“You’re serious?”

“Gabe, I love that girl with my whole heart. I want to do whatever I can to help her. She loves hockey and she doesn’t want to quit. But right now…. She’s not happy playing hockey.”

“Yeah, you take her with you. Just…”

“Be careful, I know.”

+

When Nate brought her home, Alexandria was wearing a signed Hillary Knight jersey and looking ten times happier than she had when she left.

“Thank you, daddy,” she said, hugging him tightly.

Gabe looked over at Nate, who grinned in return before leaving.

15.

Alexandria was fourteen and starting high school and Gabe was not ready for it.

He was also incredibly worried about her class schedule - because she was taking all AP classes and none of her electives were “fun classes”. 

“Daddy, I’m trying to get into Harvard in four years,” she replied when he mentioned it, “They’re not going to care that I got an A in Art or Choir. But an A in Stats, they will care about.”

“I just don’t want you to overwork yourself,” Gabe had replied.

“How about we make a deal?” Alexandria countered, “If I ever feel like I’m getting overwhelmed, then I will immediately tell you and we can discuss possible schedule changes.”

“Only if you actually tell me,” Gabe countered.

Alexandria held out her pinky to Gabe and he linked his to it, selling the deal.

16.

Honestly, Gabe was surprised it had taken her fifteen years to give him a major heart attack, especially during a hockey game. But he shot up out of his seat as she crumpled to the ice and couldn’t get back up.

He was in a panic the whole ambulance ride there, EJ arriving at the hospital shortly after they did and waited with him as they waited for the doctor to tell them what had happened.

And what had happened was that her appendix had ruptured and they were rushing her into surgery. And all Gabe could do was sit in the waiting room. EJ sat next to him, holding him as together he could while they waited for her to be out of surgery and they could see her.

“She must have been in so much pain,” Gabe said into his hands, “And she didn’t say anything.”

“She’s a hockey player.” EJ replied, trying to not show his own anxiety.

“Erik -”

“I’m just pointing out that she has spent her entire life around hockey players. How many injuries have you, yourself, hidden?”

“But this is -”

“Kids pick up the habits of the people they’re raised around. And Allie is probably one of the most competitive kids I’ve ever met. She wasn’t going to let what she probably thought was a stomach ache stop her from playing.”

“But -”

“I’m saying it’s healthy, I’m just pointing out that I think it’s time you have that talk with her.”

“I should have had that talk with her when first started playing.”

“She’ll be okay.”

“She wasn’t though.”

“But she will be.”

+

Gabe hadn’t left her bedside since she had gotten out of surgery. Erik had hovered close by to get either of them anything they might need - he had also gotten Alexandria a giant stuffed bear from the gift shop. Nate had swung by and told Gabe that he got several gallons of ice cream for her that he put in their freezer and also presented Allie with a bouquet of what had to be at the very least three dozen yellow roses.

“Hey,” Josty knocked on the doorframe of the room, his mom behind him and red-head boy Gabe didn’t recognize standing next to them, “how is she?”

“She’s going to be okay, Tyson,” Gabe replied gently, smiling as Tyson’s face immediately smoothed out and he instantly seemed to relax.

“We wanted to stop by and give her these,” Tyson held out the bouquet of daisies and gestured to his friend, “this is JT. He’s on the school team with me, but he has a lot of classes with Allie so he asked to come with.”

The JT boy seemed to blush under the sudden attention of Gabe, EJ, and Nate.

“I need to get to the rink,” Nate told Gabe, “but Burky will be by after practice, and so will a couple of other guys.”

“I’ll make sure she knows you stopped by,” Gabe replied, standing up and hugging him.

“Daddy?” Alexandria’s voice was rough as she started waking up.

“Hey, Allie-Pop,” Gabe’s voice full of relief as she blinked her eyes open.

“Allie!” Tyson exclaimed, scrambling over to the bed, “don’t you do that to me again! JT is a horrible tutor. I need you to help me pass math.”

“Promise,” Alexandria smiled softly at him, blushing lightly when caught sight of JT - who grinned before looking down at the floor and also looking a little red and Gabe made a mental note to ask Tyson about that. His daughter could be tight lipped when she wanted to be but her best friend could not keep a secret to save his life.

17.

Alexandria is sixteen when she has her first real date to a school dance. JT would be picking her up in ten minutes and EJ, Nate, and Burky would be coming over for poker night in fifteen minutes. And Allie was determined to get them out of the house in that five minutes.

And as Gabe watched her pace a little, he was hit by how grown up she was. She was in a Crimson dress that came to her knees - Gabe had been forbidden by Beatrice to go dress shopping with them so he was seeing it for the first time - with black heels. Her makeup was light but noticeable and she had tamed her long hair to fall in waves down her back. She looked so grown up.

And when he let JT in, he saw the kid go completely speechless at the sight of her. And he saw her blush darkly in response.

She rushed him through the picture, then kissed his cheek and said that she would be back late - they were going to Denny’s after the dance with some friends - and yes, Josty would be going with them - before taking JT’s hand and letting him lead her out of the house.

And as soon as they pulled out of the driveway, EJ pulled up.

“Just missed them,” he pouted as he entered the house.

Gabe laughed in response and showed him the pictures he had taken.

+

Gabe woke up with a wince, “What time is it?”

“Midnight,” Alexandria responded, “You know you’re too old to sleep on the couch.”

“What it, child,” Gabe gave her a mock glare as he sat up, “How was your night?”

“It was a lot of fun. JT is a really great guy.” Alexandria responded, “How was your poker game?”

“Cleaned Burky out,” Gabe grinned, “Guy does not have a poker face.”

Alexandria laughed lightly before telling him goodnight and heading upstairs.

18.

She’s seventeen when Gabe gets a call from EJ at midnight that Allie showed up at his house completely wasted and that he would bring her home in the morning. And Gabe had been completely thrown. Because Alexandria was always a good kid, the perfect kid really. She never broke the rules, always respected her non-existent curfew - made sure she was home at a reasonable time. And this was… this was so out of character for her and Gabe had almost wished Erik hadn’t called because there was no way he was going to get any sleep.

+

The next morning, EJ brought Alexandria home and she headed right up the stairs.

“Managed to get some food in her,” EJ told Gabe, “hangover isn’t too bad.”

“She talk to you?”

“She’s terrified that if she doesn’t get into Harvard, you’re going to be disappointed. She’s scared of letting you down in general,” EJ sighed, “She thinks that because she hasn’t heard anything from Harvard that she didn’t get in.”

“We only just submitted the application a couple months ago,” Gabe replied, running a hand down his face, “I thought she… we’ve had so many talks about not putting so much pressure on herself.”

“I know,” EJ gave a small smile, “But I think it’s time for another talk.”

“Thanks, EJ,” Gabe hugged him.

“No problem,” EJ grinned.

+

“Hey, kid,” Gabe leaned against her doorframe.

“Hi, dad,” she croaked out in response, blanket thrown over her head.

“I think we need to have a chat.”

“I know. I made a mistake, it won’t happen.”

“Not about the underaged drinking thing. I would be a complete hypocrite if I tried giving you that talk.” Gabe sat down next to the lump that was his daughter, back against her headboard, “You know you don’t have to go to Harvard for me to be proud of you, right?”

“But Harvard has been our dream.”

“Harvard has been your dream,” Gabe corrected her gently, tugging the comforter down so he could see her face, “But if it’s not your dream anymore, we can change it.”

“No, I want it,” she replied fiercely, “...I just… I just don’t know what happens if I don’t get in.”

“You go to University of Colorado with Josty,” Gabe replied, “Or you go to any other university you want to go to. Whatever you choose to do, I will support you one hundred percent.”

“JT is going to to Michigan, I guess that could be my backup.”

“I have only ever wanted you to be happy,” Gabe replied, “And if you’re going to get completely trashed, I’d prefer you find your way to our house so that I don’t get a call from EJ that keeps me up all night worried about you.”

“Deal.”

“You feel okay?”

“I just wanna sleep.”

“Okay, princess,” Gabe dropped a kiss on her forehead and left the room, flipping the light off.

19.

It’s shortly after her eighteen birthday that Gabe is moving her into her Harvard dorm room. They had had a going away party the night before and Bear, Nate and EJ didn’t even bother hiding the fact that they were crying and she and Josty had clung tightly to each other, both of them near sobbing as they said their good-byes.

“Well, I think that’s the last of it,” Gabe said, setting down the last tub.

“Do you want to help me unpack?” Alexandria asked.

And Gabe took it. And they spent as long as possible putting off good-bye: Unpacking, finding her classes, exploring Cambridge, grabbing something to eat.

“You sure you don’t want me to reschedule my flight?” Gabe asked carefully when it got to the point that he needed to get to the airport if he didn’t want to miss his plane.

“Yeah,” Alexandria smiled tightly, “I’ll be okay.”

“I’m gonna miss you, kid,” Gabe pulled her close, hugging her tightly and trying not to cry.

“I’m gonna miss you, too, daddy,” Alexandria said into his chest.

“You call me if you ever need anything, okay?”

“Okay.”

“And, you know, maybe call me for the heck of it, occasionally.”

“Okay.”

“You have -”

“I have the list of phone numbers saved in my phone, yes,” Alexandria finally pulled back, “And, yes, Backstrom is at the top of that list because he’s the closest.”

“Okay,” Gabe nodded, “I love you, Allie-Pop.”

“I love you, too, daddy,”

Gabe kissed her forehead and hugged her one more time before he made himself get in the waiting cab.

20.

Gabe had been dreading this day for a long time. And as he stood in the brides’ room, watching Beatrice put the veil on Alexandria, he was hit with a fresh wave of emotion. It had been a year and a half since JT had asked Gabe for his blessing and a lot had changed.

Allie had graduated (at the top of her class) and JT had signed with the Avs and was making a name for himself in the NHL.

And Gabe had told himself that he wouldn’t cry, but then EJ and Bear had started the cry fest the night before and he broke down and then Nate pretended like he wasn’t also crying a little and at least one of the four of them had been crying off and on all day.

“I’ll give you two a minute,” Beatrice smiled softly, kissing Gabe’s cheek and leaving the room.

“How do I look?” Allie asked, standing up.

“Beautiful,” Gabe replied, getting choked up.

“What’s wrong, daddy?” she asked, walking over and wiping the tears away.

“Just feel like I’m losing you,” Gabe replied honestly.

“You’ll never lose me,” she replied, “I’ll always be your little girl. And Boulder isn’t even that far.”

“I can’t believe you two are letting Josty live with you,” Gabe chuckled.

“Well, he’s used to being a third wheel.”

Gabe grinned and kissed her forehead before clearing his throat and saying, “Well, you ready to get married?”

“I am.”

“Then we’d better get this show on the roll.”

21.

The following Christmas, Gabe unwrapped a tiny jersey with his old number on the back and “Grandpa” on the name plate.


End file.
